Communicating With Parents About the Value of Play in Preschool

It’s midmorning and a parent walks into your preschool classroom. Blocks are scattered across the floor, paint is mixed to the point of no return, and kids are haphazardly spilling water at the sensory table. To the parent, it looks like chaos, not learning. For some families, it’s hard to see beyond that first impression.

I’ve had parents ask me, “Why are they just playing?” and “Where are their handwriting worksheets?” These questions can make teachers feel defensive, but it’s important to remember that those questions are rooted in love and worry.

With rising academic expectations and the constant comparison that social media provides, it’s easy for parents to feel like their children are falling behind. Some parents may also carry their own difficult school memories and want a different experience for their child. Others may be under pressure from pediatricians, family members, or friends whose kids seem to be hitting milestones faster. There’s also the ever-present myth that earlier means better that leads some caregivers to worry that if their child isn’t reading by age 4, something must be wrong.

This stress shows up in questions that may feel sharp but are really asking if their child is going to be OK. Part of our job as preschool teachers is to quiet that alarm with compassion and clarity.

The Power of Play

In a highly engaged classroom, play isn’t random, it’s intentional. Sure, play can look messy and wild. But play is where the brain builds meaningful connections. Sitting at a desk and completing worksheets might look productive, but it often builds compliance rather than curiosity. For children to wire the complex cognitive and executive function skills they need later in school, they need movement, interaction, and hands-on learning that leads to discovery.

Essential life and learning skills are being built during play. These skills won’t show up as perfect worksheets, but they will show up as confident readers, flexible thinkers, and kids who love to learn. Here are the skills that parents should know are being built during play:

1. Oral language and vocabulary through songs, stories, and conversation
2. Early literacy awareness through rhymes, sound play, and storytelling
3. Math and spatial skills through block building, puzzles, and sorting
4. Social and emotional growth through naming feelings, practicing empathy, and learning routines
5. Independence and confidence through choice-making and problem-solving

Responses to Help Families Understand Your Classroom

Helping families value play starts with how we talk about it. Here are a few go-to phrases I’ve used, or coached others to use, during parent meetings, daily drop-offs, and quick chats at pickup.

Caregiver concerns:

• “They’re just playing all day.”
• “I don’t see any papers coming home.”
• “Why isn’t my child reading yet?”
• “How will I know my child is ready for kindergarten?”

What teachers can say:

• “Play is a developmentally appropriate way to learn at this age. When they build with blocks or play pretend, they’re building vocabulary, math skills, and problem-solving.”
• “There won’t be much of a paper trail because we focus on hands-on experiences.”
• “Instead of worksheets, we do rich activities and provocations that help your child think deeply and explore.”
• “We’re building the foundation for reading, like recognizing letters, hearing sounds in words, and loving books. Skipping those steps often causes problems that are harder to fix later.”
• “We’re watching for growth in areas like following directions, managing feelings, and using language to solve problems. These skills will help your child have a smooth transition to kindergarten.”

Strategies for Building Trust and Communication

You don’t need to give parents a literature review to understand your teaching philosophy, but you can guide them through the SparkNotes version of early childhood development in a way that’s meaningful and clear.

Photographs with captions: Post pictures of children working with clear, intentional captions like “Building fine motor skills while exploring color mixing.”

Weekly newsletters: Share a quick update with learning goals, skills, and what’s happening through play in your classroom.

Share positive observations at pickup: Try saying, “Did you see how your child problem-solved during cleanup today?” These small moments build trust and show thoughtfulness.

At the end of the day, we’re not just educators. We’re community builders. We’re helping families nurture children into curious, confident learners who are grounded in connection, creativity, and care. Play-based learning may not always produce stacks of papers or easily checked benchmark boxes, but it lays the bricks for everything that comes next. We’re helping to mold problem-solvers, empathetic classmates, and lifelong thinkers.

So the next time a parent asks if their child is actually learning, smile and say, “Absolutely. In more ways than you can imagine.”