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Teacher, Writer, and Artist


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You can easily get your nose hairs and ear hairs and eye brows singed off in a Japanese hibachi steak house in Columbus, Georgia

Even though they’ve gotten in trouble for being loud in a museum, it’s probably not a good example for a teacher to scream at them in the museum for being loud in a museum

If there’s a gift shop in a museum, and there always are, the boys will spend more time in the gift shop than they did in the museum

Later in the week, make sure you tell the boys that the fellow acting as a pirate in that haunted old restaurant was really a pirate and see how they ponder over that information for the rest of the week, especially since the fellow acting like a pirate really did seem like he was one

When you learn that a couple of them have not called their parents not once during the week and when they also tell you their parents have not called them not once during the week try real hard not to act like something is real, real wrong with both of those things

You might consider pulling off to a hardware store and having a copy made of the bus key in order to keep you from totally freaking out and having a near heart attack the moment you think you’ve lost the only bus key

When you ask them to be packed and ready outside their rooms at 8 o’clock and they’re packed and ready outside their rooms at 7:55 you must do all you can to ignore their irritating and smug expressions when they have successfully and totally called your bluff

Totally impress the kids by asking site managers and museum guides questions site managers and museum guides don’t know the answer to

When Sheldon gets into that weird habit of using cuss words in his conversations and you know he really isn’t doing it deliberately, don’t give him a wonderful nickname, like Cuss Master, which is the one we gave him, which then acts to encourage him even more to use profanity in his conversations for the rest of the week

You’ll be surprised how they don’t get mad when you remind them every day to please take showers or baths and to please shampoo their hair. They all know they should practice comprehensive and frequent hygiene but most of the time they’re apocalyptically uninterested in doing it.

When you get back from a week of overnight field trips and you’re putting your personal stuff in your truck and there’s Percy standing there watching you and you’re prodding Percy to make sure he tells Lurlene that Todd and Gary are the most awesome teachers on Earth as well as your heroes make sure Percy’s mother isn’t standing behind you and you didn’t know it. It’s slightly embarrassing when that happens.

Hope for Curriculum Mapping

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Like many of us, my districts have turned to curriculum mapping and have focused on Atlas. Practically, as a teacher, I love the idea of doing the heavy lifting, brow sweating type of work once and then having it carry on by the click of a button, year after year. However, it constrains the classroom limiting creativity. Once students get in stride, teachers know best when their class can benefit from a side project or a lesson delving deeper into a subject. If we are slaves to curriculum maps, there is no wavering from the time allowance and we are forced to move on with the master calendar.

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